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| My friend, Tim Heron. |
WELCOME! It is Wednesday as I write this PART. I've done A MILLION THOUSAND HUNDRED THOUSAND MILLION JOBS today! Means I'll likely include HOLY BLURSDAY in this too! A bonus extra long read for my friends! Wednesday has been productive because I only had one Skype meeting. Which lasted an Anna Wintour approved 15 minutes. (She never let's them go longer than that. When I grow up I'll be just like her. She was 39 when she took over Vogue US. I have 2.25 years to do the same.)
It's a stunningly beautiful day. But, I went to the shop for the first time in three weeks yesterday. (Needed to buy emergency gin amongst other emergency items). I did not enjoy my shop experience. No one is socially distancing. Yes they're all wearing creepy gloves and using the hand sanitizers. A lot of them are wearing masks as weird chin warmers? I'm glad your double chin is now warm, weird shop goers. But, they're not trying to keep a safe distance from each other. We were even called up in the checkout queue well before the cashier was ready. We were standing there, like dopes. Me with my PARANOID EYEBALLS POPPING OUT OF MY BRAIN. Doinnnnng, my eyeballs said! PANIC, they bounced!! And we were less than a breath from the next cashier. Although we had our backs to each other, it's hardly the 2m distance I've been so keen to observe on all my little walkies. I worry so much for all those lovely people working everywhere now.
And so, the beautiful day has now become overcast. As I've looked on, and spent a lot of time worrying (between my million jobs, obv). There's a woman across the road who visits her elderly parents three times a day. Bringing them their meals and newspapers I'm guessing. She's masked and gloved up to the HILT. Yet, two of our neighbours, KEEP approaching her. (Middle aged women from two separate houses) They open her car door and chat away to her as if this is a normal Wednesday. Usually with a cigarette hanging out of their mouths. BEHAVING AS NORMAL. As if my main source of entertainment this week has been watching two dogs fall deeply in love FOR NO REASON. I can't get my head around it. Started shouting at them from inside my guts. Not outside though. I'm WAY TOO POLITE for any neighbourly confrontation. Quite different from Wife. When one of them approached her, she told them to stand back. My hero.
Is it that people are avoiding the news so much that they've missed all this? I feel as though it's so clear? How are people behaving so normally? I can't fathom it.
Naturally I had a very active evening of nightmares last night. In one of these mares, Wife and I were in a quarantine. Nigella was also there? Which would have been great, except we weren't allowed to touch ANYTHING AT ALL. And it was very ominous and frightening. A pristine white room. Shiny frightening surfaces. All these people were landing in on air planes to join us and it was very overwhelming.
Please note, I would like to welcome Nigella back to my dreams post KORONA, tell her agent!
IN OTHER NON NEWS FROM WEDNESDAY: Tim Heron visited us! Who is Tim Heron? I'm glad you asked. Tim Heron is a heron that visits our garden on a regular basis. He was on our back wall today. He is my friend. He doesn't know he's my friend. But, he is. With his wise flowing feathers, slender knowledgeable limbs. He is my Korona Gandalf. Standing on things. Staring at things. Being out and about. Above us all.
Actual news was that new laws came into effect today! Giving Gardaí the ability to arrest people if they go beyond 2km from their homes. What a weird world we're living in right now. I miss the freedom of Tim Heron, flapping about with his long elegant beard. Like a bird wizard, who is free. But, I know I'd miss the many people we could save much, much more than this temporary loss of freedom.
I made the mistake of looking at something today too. The beautiful obituary section recently released on the New York Times website. All these fascinating, vibrant, gorgeous people lost to this insane virus. Who didn't get a proper goodbye. Who made incredible differences in the world.
My own big sister will be going for another shift in the Covid Ward on Saturday.
Seems like the biggest pile of idiocy now. My freaking out over a webinar about webinars yesterday.
In brighter romance news: horny dog is waiting outside lady dogs house for possible shags. He's been there most of the day. She comes to the window and sits on the top of the sofa. They watch each other. It's like our own private soap opera without the fade outs for the moments you don't want to see. I'll keep you briefed on this ongoing love story.
Another nice thing! Our state sanctioned postcards arrived! Along with a magical one from one from one of the very best people on this planet. It's only in the guise of this anonymity that I can be openly kind to him. We have more of a 'let's insult each other all the time' relationship. WELL, I'm not exaggerating when I say it was the most perfect postcard I've ever SEEN! Tim Heron even got a special mention! It made me so happy. Yet sad I can't see this little menace who penned it. Some weird juice even started falling from my eyeballs. Must be allergic to external kindness.
Typing now to the soundtrack of Wife cutting her own fringe. A little fluffy fro fringe. She wants her eyebrows covered in her journey out, I'm told. She turns to me, "Rick James with questionable eyebrows." she decides. She's been speaking a lot about how the wind flows through her leg hairs nowadays too. In a wistful, ambitious way. Almost how I imagine Enya would talk about it.
I went for a little loner walk while Rick James was out. Tried exploring this land that Tim Heron calls his home....THE OUTSIDE. I was trying to soak up some of this sun juice people always talk about.
Immediately as I went out to the end of my road, WORRY ARRIVES! Hiya Worry! A 21st birthday party round the corner, IN A FRONT GARDEN. Balloons adorned it. Pink ones, with 21 on them. Like an advertisement on how to ignore social distancing. And to tell me what age the moronic party person was.
I was wearing sun cream from Lidl. I did a rage walk and lots of deep breaths. Would recommend! Not the sun cream part though. THE SWEAT!!!!!!!! Ded.
Well, it is now HOLY BLURSDAY. I was in meetings from 9.30am - 1.05pm. WOULD NOT RECOMMEND. The sun cream sweat of days. Randy dogs got action again, thank god for them. HOLY BLURSDAY should end with a bottle of wine, I've now decided. Would mean having to visit a shop though.
I bet Tim Heron had no meetings today. He stands there, while we all freak out, being free.
Do I wish I was Tim Heron? Is that what I'm trying to say? With all this Korona, I'm imagining I'll have a fine beard by the end of this. And with all this exercising I'm doing, I too will have slender bird like limbs. But, forget all that, I'll be free. That's the thing I'll really look forward to.
x
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