Saw a small terrier taking himself out for a walk today. He had a little harness jacket thing that said 'security'. Doing his lil patrol. Breaking my lil heart. A good theme for today.
I also gobbled a piece of cherry blossom leaf with my left eyeball. The self same eyeball that murdered a fly yesterday. It's odd, because I've had this stye in my left eye the last few months. It won't go away. I wonder if it's the source of this virus. I've also sneezed thrice. Into my inner elbow, obv. May have Korona. Hope I don't have the Corona. My left eyeball, consuming the world. It is a threatening yellow green colour. Very virus-like.
I've been so careful. I think? I've noticed people being a bit more observant about social distancing now today. Fears of off licences closing, I assume. Apart from a few absolutely wrecked joggers who are just trying to jog and can't focus on anything else other than jogging. I understand. I'm a recent jog-eee. In that I try muster a moderate run for up to 2 minute stretches. I will definitely be Krumlin's Kate Moss by the end of this, thank goodness. Along with hopefully having a fully functioning left eyeball that is no longer wrecking nature. Yet, even when I'm jog/dying, I still go to elaborate lengths to distance myself from others. The term social distance is a strange one. It's not like my puffpanty half run past a person could ever be classed as social. In fact, it's the opposite of social. What's social about crossing the road AWAY FROM EVERYONE? Hi Neighbour, just avoiding you at all costs! I've started waving at people I recognise so that they know I'm actually trying to be their hero and not that I think they're dirty.
Moved offices again today. Where you ask? Right corner of my sofa. Again, watching my neighbours. I don't call myself Koronakreep for nothing. I've watched a few of them pull up with masks on their faces, delivering things to relatives who also have masks on. MAYBE DRUGS! Could this be my moment to become a home-detective?! ANY CASES FOR ME? It has to be one of the most surreal things to witness someone masked up out your window as you're trying to plod through a document. I'll never get used to it. The threat of a friendly visit/drug drop. (Most likely their dinner, everyone is very nice around here to be fair)
I got dressed today too! Like an achievement. I'm wearing this flowery green dress that is WAY too short for public consumption. Tks hun Penneys! It allows me to feel like a human. All while fashioning into a strange position on the corner of my sofa for the day. I'll retreat to my 'home office' tomorrow - note my 'home office' is a tiny table i painted blue in the corner of my living room. It might be the most pathetic office in the world. I had thought the working from home thing would be lovely. And don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful to be in a position to continue working from home for a job I adore. To be able to keep in regular contact with all these deadly people I work with is the very best part. But, let me tell you, having a dancing wife in your face amid your weekly team meeting is challenging. Have you ever seen a woman in a blue Adidas tracksuit ride a headphone wire as if she were on a horse? All while trying to update your team on live stream technology? No? Is this not normal? Plus we're on diets. So no afternoon wine. Remember that I am soon to be Kate Moss.
The niggling anxiety of how threatening the world is right now can be distracting. Particularly in the day to day gazing at excel sheets which has become my passion. Sometimes it's a physical anxiety. Like an hour ago. When I tried to watch that lockdown announcement from Leo on the shambles that is the RTE player. I have a dull thud in the centre of my nose since. Anxie-thud. May also be frustration, if they can't work a live player, HOW CAN THEY SAVE US. Mostly, I'm looking at older people walking past my window in masks with their shopping and trying not to cry. I'm generally a really cheerful, happy person who is not anxious. But the world just feels different. Threatening. And like we can't go out there. Most threatening was seeing a group of about 12 teenage boys walking past my window this evening.
Cheering me up though, is trusty wife-face. She's spent a good 10 minutes today tapping her head to see what falls out. She's done it on two occasions now. A dull thud to go with my weird nose thud. Fluff, leaves, her hair is a treasure chest, like her really. There is a particular treasure of being a weird person(her), living with another weird person (me), who you like (her), who does weird stuff all the time(both). Suits the current climate well. When I clock off, we're watching nice mindless things that have nothing to do with Korona anything. Predominantly 'Home of the Year' or 'Come Dine', anything that's based in homes and where no one is frightened. Would recommend.
I mean, I'll be honest. I'm a classic lesbian. In that I never go out anymore. Really, I spend most of my time looking at my wife's tiny head and adoring it. It is so small, like a little peanut! And I don't really go OUT OUT all that much. But there's so much else to going out! Like dinners! And pints! And cinema! And cinema-treats! And being around all my friends! And getting them to give me food! (50% of those things revolving around food there - MUST CHANNEL KATE MOSS!!!!!!!)
My korona kreep diary is moderately less cheerful today. Likely to do with that anxie-thud in my noseballs......or maybe it's my eyeball spreading to my NOSEBALL. I'M either DOOMED or gonna be SLIM. More tomorrow. Are you still reading? Impressive.x
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